A fantasy that I had as an eight year old was The Orphan Fantasy. The Orphan Fantasy is that I was/am (I mean, this is no longer a fantasy I have, but it never changed, so...) an orphan. I am not sure why this was such a great fantasy. It might have had to do with The Little Princess and Annie. Orphans are so precociously heroic. They have no one, and yet everyone loves them. (Fallacy of logic, eight year old self. You loved them.)
So, when I played with my American Girl Doll (Kirsten. The best one because she wasn't actually American, she was Swedish. I have always been a Europeanist.), she was always an orphan. She was at swanky orphan country school, though. She got to wear different dresses to different classes. And whenever she went on trips, whether it be by train or by ocean, she traveled in her nightgown, in bed. It was more comfortable that way. (I have since learned that sleeping on trains is definitely more comfortable than having to sit in the 3ftx3ft family car, but it is by no means comfortable by normal standards.)
(My use of parentheses could win an award).
So, tonight as I was lounging, I realized that opening my window could be a great decision. It was raining earlier today, and the night is cool... Almost autumny. Basically a dream. So I opened the window, and with my lights off, listening to the "bustle" of University Ave at 10:00 PM, I caught a glimpse of The Orphan Fantasy come to life. Chilly. Alone. No parents. No brothers. No American Girl Doll. Homework. No Heath Ledger. Bad mattress. No money. *sudden despair* NO HOPE. NO DREAMS. NO NOTHING. HEATH IS DEAD. NO COMING BACK. NO MORE HARRISON FORD IN STAR WARS. THE HISTORY TA OFFICE IS GONE. SO ALONE. SO DARK. ALONE FOREVER. BUT REALLY. WHAT IF I DIE...
And then the timer went off for my brownies. Fantasy ended, world set at right.
I am sorry for every orphan out there. I love all the orphans in the whole world.
No comments:
Post a Comment