wearing the pants.

I have one pair of jeans that I love. One.

I have five other pairs of pants, but three of them are ankle-long so I can't wear them in the winter without getting frost bite ankles, one of them is a really light blue pair of legging-pants that are sometimes the tackiest thing I own, and the fifth is another pair of jeans that are slightly too tight so I hate wearing them. And really, I can only wear that last pair with sweatshirts, which makes me feel even more muffin-top-tastic than I already am (because sweatshirts sometimes emphasize muffin tops more than conceal them. I would know).

Since my one pair of jeans gets stretched out in 1-2 long days, and we are reaching the snowy months of the year, I feel like I need to invest in either boots or more pants. I am leaning towards new pants, because 2/3 of the ankle-cut pants are summer colors and I don't like wearing them in the winter (yes, I am one of those grandmas that believes there are summer and winter colors).

The one pair of jeans that I love is from Gap. That means they were expensive and they are expensive. My mom would tell me not to go out and buy another pair, because what if I just worked hard and lost ten pounds and then the tight pair of jeans would fit? Well, then I would have to buy four pairs of pants to make up for the four that don't fit any more! Losing weight may be healthier, contribute to a better self-image and increase my life expectancy, but do I have $300 to revamp my pants drawer right now? No. Also, I love cake.

So now I have to face the hell that is pants shopping. I already know that Target will yield nothing. I haven't fit into Target pants for 6 years. Old Navy is also out. Even their skinny jeans make me look like a mermaid. Ross is not optimal, since I prefer to not have apples or cats on my butt pockets. Forever XXI pants are the cheapest, but I also wear out the thighs of those pants in like 2 months. BASICALLY I AM ONLY WILLING TO BUY AND WEAR GAP JEANS.

SO SCREW YOU, GAP INC., FOR MAKING GREAT JEANS! This Friday is pay day so I'll see you this weekend. xoxo